I live in a house with seven girls. For some this might be incredibly challenging, sound like college all over again, or give you flashbacks to your sorority days. For me, this has been a beautiful picture of authentic community and one that I desire to have in the future.
In the past, my living situations have varied. There are moments where I would find myself in homes, condos, apartments, and dorms. There have been better living situations than others, but there is one unifying factor. Living in community has always been worth it. There are countless things I have learned about myself and regardless of the circumstance, growth has always occurred.
Here are a few of the lessons I’ve learned from living in community.
Unconditional love is a choice.
When you live with someone you tend to see all of their “stuff.” You see the less than beautiful side of people. There are going to be days where you don’t “feel” like loving someone. The dishes are always in the sink, your favorite mug was broken, and their hair is always in the shower drain. These are the moments where your love for someone is tested. How you respond in these moments and the subsequent days, show how you truly care for your roommates, how you love and support them. Unconditional love is challenging, but is a choice that is always worth it.
Living with others keeps you inspired.
I live with amazing songwriters, chefs, musicians, and intellectuals. When I see the way someone in my house encounters faith, the way they put love and service into baking breads and cakes, or the joy that is brought with fresh new songs, I am challenged. These ladies keep me inspired to dream big dreams with my own life and to move forward in faith, in life, and in passion. Surround yourself with quality people and you will find the same.
Vulnerability is hard, but worth it.
Vulnerability is one of those things. It’s hard and puts you in a place that is exposed and uncomfortable. However, when you find the people that you can show your stuff to, and they still love you, well, in that moment being known is worth it. Often I find myself in this tension. Do I share with them openly and honestly? Can I trust this person? Can I give my love away to them freely without fear? In many seasons, I haven’t when in community and have regretted it. The words of insecurity and fear kept me from deep connections with others. I withheld my love, talents, passions, and gifts out of fear. The relationships never got to the depth I desired. I would walk away from those relationships wishing they had gone much differently.
Hugs and smiles always help bad days (encouragement is necessary).
Everyone is going to have good and bad days. There are going to be moments where life feels incredibly mundane and far from the dreams we hoped for. In these moments, learn how to be an encourager. Offer hugs and smiles freely. When you see someone struggling, don’t run in the opposite direction or find yourself too preoccupied with your life. Stop and generously love those around you. Develop a culture of celebration for the everyday moments and commit to living life beautifully.
What are some of the lessons you’ve learned from community?